Joke Night

Our thanks to Chili who sent in these funnies.

7/7/10

WHAT HAPPENS IN LOUISVILLE.....STAYS IN LOUISVILLE

What now ???

OK now I don't mind letting the dog write a few columns when it gets slow here and she goes to convention but I don't want this spa turned into a dating agency or over-run with love letters. Please get a grip on yourselves boys, After all she is still a child and as her equine guardian I won't allow her to respond to this type of attention.

Daisy

a cat writes a letter to Kai

Hello cat this is kai , i have space eyes, come to me cat, come to me , RUN CAT RUN RUN RUN
it will be fun , yes it will , after i chase you for a few hours you can chase me , ok ok, lets play hahahaha. I can fix the dull part of you life cat, come over and play yes yes we will have fun fun and just so you know , I am good, I do as i am asked, like come when called but it is ok cat, you are not smart like me , you can not learn anything , you were made by God to run away so I can chase you . Please fulfil your destiny. You can ride on my back cat, yes you can, I have a saddle pack , see the picture it is pink becasue I am a girl , I am quivering with excitement to play with you cat

A day or two in the mountains

KAI LIKES ICE CREAM, SEND ME ICE CREAM PLEASE, I REALLY LIKE THIS STUFF. I will be very good for ice cream, Do you want Sit kai - stay kai, then give kai Ice Cream for reward

_______________________. Kai is on guard, kai is a good girl and takes care of the man, kai sees trouble like Rin Tin Tin .I am so smart , I am so smart yes I am and I am brave too beacuse kai Jumps in to pull the man out . Today the man left and it is good I am brave because me and the woman person spent all day Hanging out. hanging out can be dangerous. we went swimming and I had to pull the woman out too , These people are not smart like Me, I am so smart it is astounding to the woman, what is astounding ? it sounds good whatever it is, Kai is astounding and brave and pretty and smart and big , I will be like business and have my name with designations BellaKai AB PSB

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ok,ok,ok listen to me , I am funny I am so funny, Gwen, you like trunk monkey, yes you do, I know you do, but you don't need trunk monkey , you say to me, Kai , why don't i need trunk monkey. I tell you hahahaha...... you have Trunk Puppy. Hahahah OK bad guy, just try it my teeth are sharp I bark very loud , hahah, I am brave brave kai, yes i am brave and pretty and good well maybe not so good because i am now running from the feds. Really i am bad and the woman is bad, poor kai is not good anymore . Maybe that is why I am hiding in the trunk, to hide from the feds, maybe kai is not funny maybe kai is going to prison. kai as been in prison and doesn't want to go back, Kai is sad . It is not bad kais fault , Kai is a good girl and does what the woman wants and the woman took me hiking and I read the sign cause I am smart Kai and good Kai and we went walking in the Smokey Mountains and It was illegal to for me to go, bad kai bad dog. The woman didn't care if I was bad, I am so confused. She says we are on the lamb. Aren't lambs like baby sheep ?????Does lamb taste good ? does it , I would like to try some, they are furry aren't they If i had lamb I would like being a fugative. hahaha kai is will be a very good bad dog hahah

Today we also went to Gatlinburg. we walked down the street, my favorite thing was a person puppy that had to wear a leash too. He was a good puppy like me , I am good ,he is good, I licked his hand he had candy he tasted good, I am so pretty. Even the person puppy thought I was pretty and soft and he wanted to touch me .

Here we are socializing, that is a hard word for me to spell but I am smart so it is fine and I am good , I was very good at socializing because I didn't bother anyone or even notice any of the 40 million people on the street, see I am very smart cause I can count high. Personal question from Kai, does me butt look too fat with my brown cheeks ?

Look at me , look look aren't I pretty, everyone stops to say " Oh what a pretty dog" I am very pretty and I am so good, she tells me I am good and that makes me happy , now I am happy and good but mostly I am pretty , oh yeah everyone says I am big, Everyone says nice things about me but I have big teeth so maybe they are just being nice to kai so Kai will be nice back
This is my new toy, I will drag it home, it is furry and I can play with it . I am a good girl and very pretty and smart too cause didn't I pose like rin tin tin and look nice in my official Gatlinburg Tourist photo, aren't I A good girl

OKOK so much to do here , I must go and do things. thank you for reading, ohoh I am such a good girl, I said thank you, kai is soooo goood. good Kai. We are going to Cades Cove. I don't know what that is but I am so happy to go. It is what we dogs to best. Oh yes, Kai is enthusiastic , hahaha, pretty , good, brave, astounding big and enthusiastic. hahahaha

Hi from Kai

Hi, I am Kai, I am a good girl, I have the computer , I am smart and pretty and I am a big girl, I am 10 moths old and I can write , I can write because there is spell check , I am so smart, and pretty did i tell you I was pretty. Here is a picture of me thinking, I like to think, I am so good , I am a good girl, yes I am, good kai good girl. I am thinking about how pretty I am and if I want to chase a bird, No , no chasing birds, bad kai, kai is a good girl. Because I am smart I am in my big dog house, I know something is happening and it has to do with the big dog house, see me , I drawed a circle around my pretty face, see me waiting because I am a good girl, stay kai , stay ............. good girl , good girl good kai, pretty kai, I am pretty yes i am. We are going camping, what is camping, I want to go camping, I am pretty , do you have to be pretty to go camping , I am such a good girl,

Look at me , I am a big girl, I can jump on the big bed in the camper because I am a big good girl, I want to sleep with the people in the big bed, I don't want to sleep on the floor . I am sure the people want me to jump in the bed, yes i am sure, I am a big pretty girl and I had a bath yesterday, Yes, yes I am sure they want pretty Kai in bed, What does " GET DOWN FROM THERE YOU MANGY MUTT" mean, does that mean that we are playing a game, Fun game, fun fun fun game Hahaha, reach for kai you puny human ......hahaha yes Kai is having fun. Kai likes this game, you can't catch me hahahah

Here is a picture of smart Kai that is me, I am kai I am driving with the man, He can not drive by himself , he needs pretty Kai. How fast we can go in the car, I can run very fast but the mans machine can go much faster, I like this machine and I want to borrow it to chase cats, may I borrow the machine that drives to chase the cat at the home please, Kai is good , yes she is . good kai can run fast. I am good, yes I am. Kai is paying much attention to driving , maybe I will see a bird, YES I like to see birds. We watched the movie UP..., Can I get a voice thing like DUG please I will be good , I will not talk too much but I really want to talk ,to humans yes I do, I want to talk because I am so smart and pretty, Yes I am pretty and GOOD , I am a good girl. good kai

OOOH OOOH, my favorite thing. Magic space eyes for Kai, look look I caught this giant cow, it was at subway ( that is where the humans hunt for sandwiches ) , I am there with the cow because I caught it , yes I did, I used my magic space eyes yes i did, I lured it to me , I said ..... come to me cow , come to me . Yes that it it....... I trained the giant cow, STAY COW...... COME COW. hahahah Kai is funny haha , Yes i am funny and pretty, yes I am pretty girl and so very smart, good kai.

Bye bye for now, we are in the machine going to the mountains. we stayed in the dog house in Georgia last night and I was a good girl and didnt chase other dogs or even bark , I did growl cause I am brave, Kai is brave and pretty, Kai is a good girl. I am such a brave big pretty girl that Daisy said that when I grow up I can have the job of head of security at the spa, what is a job? Is it fun, will I want to do it every day ????

GUESS WHAT !!!!!! I am going to catch a bear in the mountain, yes I am , a bear would be fun and play with me . no one will say NO KAI.. LEAVE THE KITTY ALONE. I am a good girl but I still think that the kitty makes a good toy,, it is is furry and makes funny sounds and it runs and that is alot of fun . I would like to put in a smiley dog face, where are the smiley dog faces, are they pretty dogs, are they good dogs. My name is BellaKai , it means pretty water.. I am very pretty

Bye from Kai, ha ha that rythms, I made a poem , bye kai bye kai I am so smart I am a smart girl, good kai, good dog.

BORING

My dear, dear readers.

I am so sorry but there just hasn't been anything to share with you in weeks. It is hot and we are miserable. The keepers are being kind and not asking anything from us right now. We are even waiting until after the sun sets to have our dinner because the heat is so oppressive.

If anything worthy of sharing happens you will be the first to know . I am tempted to let the new dog write the column. She is the only one doing anything noteworthy of late. She is in formal training trying to earn her K9 good citizen award and she is getting ready to go on a trip to the mountains.

Me.............. I am just sweaty and long for the Swiss Alps where I belong

Kisses

Droopy Daisy

BUT WAIT, THERES MORE !!!!'

Hello my dear readers, it is soooo hot here , we aren't doing much of anything but eating. The water is even too hot to cool off in. We spend most of the day in the air flow room the groundskeeper was kind enough to build for our comfort. During our long afternoons of tail swishing we have come up with a new business venture and want to preview it here for you.

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Today we feature our model Kai.

You will see from this article cut from the internet

that shedding is a very big problem for German Shepherd Dogs . We here at the spa took literally the admonishment that "frequent vacuuming" is a must and have solved the issue of Shepherd Shedding.

We here at Daisy Enterprises would be happy to sell you your own Sheperd De-shedder for just 59.95* plus shipping and handling

* per week

Unlikely Friends

Photo says all.